SELF PRESERVATION KINDNESS
Kindness is a societal norm accepted as “the right thing to do”. And it is. The right thing. To do. To think. To be. Self preservation kindness is an adaptation of the golden rule.
When we extend kindness to others we make their day better. Or brighter. Or filled with appreciation of our deed or thoughtfulness. We extend something of ourself towards another.
Kindness towards others is admirable. Kindness towards ourselves polishes the kindness craft.
KINDNESS CONQUERS SELFISHNESS
Kindness squashes selfishness. It snuffs it out. Selfish people need to fuel their own “me-ness”. And selfishness is hungry. It needs continual snacks of self- importance and “me- first- ness.”
Kindness expands itself. It becomes an automatic response. We don’t need to remember to breathe. Truly kind people don’t need memos to extend kindness to others. They may need a refresher on how to be kind to themselves.
PRACTICE SELF PRESERVATION KINDNESS
Kindness towards others is not difficult. It doesn’t take practice to learn. Kindness to and for us is different. Unfamiliar. Even awkward.
We are taught not to be selfish. Not to think only of ourself. Not to be a narcissist. This is appropriate in a world tilted towards “all about me.” What a kind person may sacrifice though is healthy SELF kindness that preserves our dignity and self- respect.
We become better, more familiar and accomplished with practice. Practice of anything, A sport. A habit. An attitude. Practicing kindness towards ourselves preserves us. It makes us more mindful, It brings forth the person we choose to be.
GETTING THE KICK OF KINDNESS
So..how does this work? Being kind to me? What does that mean? How does that feel? How do I think that way?
The meaning of self kindness begins with appreciation. Of who you are. Of what you offer to those around you. Consider the kindnesses you extend to others. Consider the respect you demonstrate when you are kind.
Kindness to you requires a filter. It requires that you are kind enough to yourself to say no. It requires that you respect your right to set boundaries. It requires that you recognize when you need to slow down. Self kindness requires honesty. Being kind to yourself requires that you recognize that you need kindness. From you . To you. For you.
http://scientificamerican.com presents examples of how kindness and generosity to one’s self “makes your own day.” We can brighten our own world by being kind to ourself when we need to be. And we DO know when we need to be kinder to ourself.
We feel it. The exhaustion. The lack of appreciation from others. The hints that we are feeling victimized. The realization that we are not being the person we want to be.
Kindness to you is gentle. It is not geared by anger. It is a quiet and strong synergy of your authentic self.
This post will resonate with people who practice kindness. It will seem wonky and weird to those who confuse selfishness with self kindness.
If this resonates with you. If this intrigues you. If this interests you. Contact me for a complimentary session on how to be kind to yourself. Together we can create a practice of kindness to preserve you.
