Intention and Purpose in Caregiving
Intentional Caregiving separates the tasks from the emotions of caregiving. Intentions determine the results we desire from a determined purpose.
Caregivers are masters of task determination and management. We can quote the laundry list of necessary tasks, prioritize ,schedule and budget associated costs.
While we are in the lockstep of ongoing caregiving, we often lose sight of what we intend to accomplish with our efforts. We know what to do. We know when to do the caregiving tasks. We know how to complete caregiving tasks.
We can become so task focused that we fail to establish and remember why we caregive. Being clear on our caregiving intentions gives purpose to our tasks. It shifts how we view our roll. It gives meaning to the support we provide. It helps to diminish the emotional drain of long term care.
Default vs. Design in Caregiving
Our intention or purpose in caregiving is established by how we view our role. Without purposeful understanding of why we give care, the role becomes one of default. Our parent,child, loved one or friend becomes someone we take care of.
Default caregiving stems from caregivers overlooking how they will benefit from their role. They neglect to consider of how the experience will change and enrich their lives. The default position is where most caregivers begin.
And default is easy to understand since most caregiving begins with crisis. The crisis may raise suddenly or it may be thrust upon them . It may seem a huge imposition and inconvenience. It may be a shattering new reality.
Ongoing caregiving often becomes rote task performance and crisis intervention .
When we design our caregiving we add meaning to our experience.The meaning of how we value our service to others. This cannot come from others who will applaud your efforts from a distance. It must come from you. The meaning must come from a place of some contentment, acceptance and self- appreciation. And martyrdom has NO place in a healthy design.
Design requires planning, discipline and self- reflection. Design includes attitude adjustment. Design requires saying no to unrequested opinions from others. Design reaches out to other daily members for help.
What do you intend to provide in your caregiving? What is your healthy caregiving purpose? How can you design a new caregiving regimen and plan? How do you calm the demons of resentment and exhaustion?
None of these questions are easy to ask. They are even more difficult to answer truthfully. It is tough but mot impossible.
Contact me for a sample of how we might work together for a better caregiving design for you!
