Caregiver magic-creating rescue rabbits
I have been a solo caregiver for a long time. Occasionally, I burn out on the ongoing demands .Caregiver magic-creating rescue rabbits is a strategy that jumpstarts me towards a more proactive attitude.
As a long term caregiver, I sometimes slump into useless emotions. I know this slump routine. Although familiar, it rallies the “poor me” syndrome – a shadow side of my more usual positive self. And….armed with nearly fifteen years of experience, I know how to kick this shadow self to the curb.
Caregiver choice- boundaries
Before the caregiver magic, there must be boundaries. And not boundaries of amount or distance. For example, as a caregiver, I consistently set boundaries. By this, I mean that I choose my life beyond caregiving duties.
Boundaries translate into choices. And….we always have a choice- even when they seem limited. Actually, limited caregiver choices are an excellent time to begin the Caregiver magic- creating rescue rabbits.
When I feel most trapped and limited by my caregiving, I STOP focusing on the limits and refocus on my possibilities.
Recently, I focused on the numerous freedoms many of my peers enjoyed. BIG mistake as I moved away from the choices I had into the choices not available.
Magic caregiver mind
I LOVE the illusion of a magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat. Magicians stimulate curiosity and wonder. How DO they do that trick?
And it IS a trick. WE know it but love the pure fun of the feat.
Here’s where I play the part of being my own magician. No one can create my respite or relief from long slogs of caregiving. No one else can create the rescue “rabbits” to pull out of my caregiver hat.
The longer I rest on how great everyone else seems to have it, the whinier I become.
And, a decade and half of caregiving taught me that means NOW is the time for magic!
What size rabbit do you want?
The more bummed I am by my caregiving chores, the more I need a rabbit. This rabbit represents possibilities.
Possibilities are the magic WE create. What DO you have available or possible? Perhaps the trip to New Zealand isn’t on that list- for now. BUT…..that lunch with a friend can be.
Or….hiring a home support service for a day to relieve some of the daily grind. Additionally, planning a weekend away rejuvenates your spirits just as a possibility.
Size does NOT matter! Caregiver magic-creating rescue rabbits
Most of the time, the “rabbits” I pull out of my imaginary hats are small- even tiny. I allow that the only magic rescue rabbits I can retrieve are the ones I create.
Recently,some of my favorite rescue rabbits were:
- setting up a hour coffee time with two friends
- having lunch with a favorite friend
- hiring an agency caregiver for two hours each week
- giving up my “rescue” lattes and using the money towards the last 3 items
- planning a 3 day trip out of town to re-boot myself (and YES- it took a LOT of planning!
- making the choice to say NO to requests that I “should ” do but ones that limited my discretionary time!
- starting using http://Calm.com as a daily 10 minute meditation. Great focus each morning!
OK- these may not be Giant “Harvey” size rescue rabbits! BUT….they are a commitment to keeping myself healthier and happier.
The ONLY rescue rabbits caregivers pull out of their hats are the ones they put IN the hat themselves!!